Woman and Power
I was in line at a local coffee shop to get my usual double espresso the other day and I overheard two young women talking. Not that I was eavesdropping! They were speaking loud enough for all of us in line to hear. Young Woman #1 said “I just did it again. I shared my thoughts with him as to how we can remove a couple of steps from the process and still make the goal with the same results. He pretended that he didn’t even hear me!” And then the Young Woman #2 says “Well, I have been telling you all this time. You are too powerful. Play it a little softer and he will hear you!”
Well… it was all I could do not to look at Young Woman #1 and say “Oh Em Gee!!! is she serious? Are you really buying this BS?? YOU SHOULD BE POWERFUL!!!” You owe it to yourself to be powerful.
I wanted to say, “Do you realize your power is the container that holds your softness, values, beliefs, and very essence? Do you know if you stop being powerful you won’t be soft but you will shrink yourself just to fit in?”
I didn’t tell her any of these because we don’t do such things where I live! But there is nothing stopping me from telling you the story.
The issue of powerful women and women’s power is near and dear to my heart. I want to see every woman and girl embrace the full power she is born with. After I immigrated to the United States and began to integrate into this culture, I was repeatedly told I was too strong for a woman! I bought it hook, line and sinker! I became Young Woman #1.
So, I am going to share with you what I couldn’t share with her:
I see power as the container which holds your passions, strengths, gifts, talents, love, and compassion for yourself and others; a container that holds your boldness, your courage, and your fearlessness so that you lead and live true to your essence, true to who you are.
“ Power is about presence! It is the energy that tells the world that you know who you are; you lead and live from that knowing. Power is the expression and energy of who you are! You demonstrate this every day in the way you live, lead, speak and make decisions."
Your power is not about having control over others! Your power is the foundation on which you build your life. This foundation is what enables you to stand up for what is right; not just for yourself but for others, at home and at work. This power allows you to take risks when you are called to do so. It is also the power that helps you see and stay true to the big vision of your life. Your power fuels who you are and what you stand for.
Do you relate to Young Woman #1? Is it you who might be choosing to be “softer” so you are not “too powerful”?
Are you saying “yes” when you want to say “no”?
Are you behaving in a way that is not in alignment with your own values and truth so that you fit in and get approval, or staying in situations, places, or relationships that are unhealthy for you?
Do you keep apologizing when there is no need to do so?
Tell me everything you want me to know.
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